So last night Virginia interrupted my sleep to inform me she was upset because she couldn’t find her diamond studs.  Admittedly, it started to get a bit worried and anxious about where she could have placed them.  Whenever, Virginia gets upset I find it hard to not get caught up. Besides it always does tend to bother me when something is misplaced.  My mind naturally starts visualizing all the places it could be. My “ESP” sensors go on heightened awareness.

So I needed to find a way to diffuse a bit of anxiety that was starting to rise up.  My mind started to think what if she did lose the earrings. Supposedly they were insured, but what if there was some mixup so now they aren’t?  I needed to stop from going ultra paranoid and just let go. Because despite the fact the earrings are quite valuable they are in the end only material things and material things can not be relied on much to support your emotions.  I started to think about the fact that in general expensive jewelry tends to offer a much larger risk of unhappiness vs. happiness.

Think about it.  Let’s say you strongly desire a $1000 (or whatever you’d consider expensive) plus piece of jewelry.  You get an initial satisfaction then in buying it and putting it on. But then you start to worry about losing it.  So you tend not wear it that often for it’s protection.  Then for as long as you don’t lose the expensive jewelry your emotions are sort of neutral, as the initial happiness has worn off.  So there is no more upside in happiness you can get from the jewelry once you already own it.  However, there is plenty of downside in happiness the moment you sense you’ve lost it. You get a sense of this coming out of the quote from Axel Munthe “What you keep to yourself you lose, what you give away, you keep forever.”

Anyway I was starting to feel this anxiety sensation niggling in the chest region.  So I then started visualizing the Source.  I felt the Source calling on me to visualize it as a prized diamond.  A small bright diamond is sort of like the pictures I have drawn of the Source.  Unlike a diamond the Source can not be lost and can be relied upon to place your emotions.  And as I visualized the Source as a diamond I started to feel that ecstatic sensation.  And then I felt happiness and calm.  I fell back asleep.

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