So if you’ve been reading up on https://www.tiredmiddleagedman.com I’ve been processing the rite of being layed off. For some of you readers being layed off is no big deal, so I guess I’m new at this.  But in any regards if you’re new at anything and it’s something that has happened for the first time in over 20 years, it’s kind of a big thing emotionally.  I mean for me, a 44 year old person, we’re talking about something I’ve lived with for nearly 50% of my entire life.  So I only digress like this to stress that this is emotionally quite big for me.  And within all big emotional hardships comes great opportunity to spiritual growth.  Well it’s being nice to call it an opportunity, it’s more just something that happens and you will inevitably grow whether you like it or not; it may be nice, but more likely very uncomfortable or downright terrible, but trust me you will grow.

So today I took a time out to just be more in the present.  I started to think more and more about Ekert Tolle’s title “The Power of Now” and it’s calling to be in the present.  This past Wednesday I had an opportunity to walk with a group of others in the Labryinth on the Delaware Art Museum grounds.  The process absolutely made a huge impact on me.  It uncovered the inner child in me and his desire to keep time still so that things don’t change, treasured places remain, and loved one’s don’t grow up or depart from your life.

What the Labryinth experience started to reveal to me is that we all are spreading our life energy across time.  The more we crave, wish, worry, regret, strive, move, and achieve all we are doing is spreading our trail across time.  And in the end all we really want is to be one and whole, yet we see other people, things and events around us moving and changing and we want to chase them back in time and forward in time and it stretches us further and further apart so that as time moves on we get spread thinner and thinner.  For most, maybe all of us, it isn’t until physical death do we get to gather up our entire trail across time.  Time is compressed back into a single point and the trail that was once us is gathered back together as one, we are one again, the beginning and the end, the alpha and omega together as one again.  This is your life flashing before your eyes.  This is the review of your life experience that you will go thru before you can die.

So once again I recognize the need to consider not spreading my trail.  Start raveling in my past, worry not of the future and absolutely savor the present based upon the past special moments I so so so miss.  I want to bring in my entire spirit now spread over 44 years of time back together into the present.  I want to be.

And so I found much of today, me, my mind drifting into beautiful vistas in my memory of beautiful places I’ve been to.  In fact many places of the past are so much more beautiful and precious because they simply do not exist anymore due to the fact they have been destroyed or torn down.  For example I can remember so much more vividly the time I walked on the roof of one of the World Trade Center towers.  It’s more spectacular now than it was back then.  And this is a big key.  In just the same manner you can recall a memory more spectacular and precious than it was when you first experienced it, you can apply that principle right now in the present.  Know this, that this moment where ever you are is so special and precious and many many years from now you will wish you were here.  Know this feeling and starting wishing you were here right now.  And this wishing so badly you were here while actually being here is at least part of what it means to be Now in The Power of Now.  I would probably add start bringing in the past as well and bring back all of your spirit into the present.  Miss yourself no more.

In this state I had noticed one thing, that the having a bright Sun somewhere helps — a lot. And it started to dawn upon me today that I can actually hear the Sun?!  What do I mean?

I mean I remember a year ago I traveled to the Bahamas and it was so so Sunny and I was in my hotel room and when the window was open, even with my eyes closed I could smell, hear and feel tropical paradise. But what was so clear was this sort of background sound, which I think was the sound of the Sun. My best logical explanation for what this sound is, is it’s probably a bit of the heat that the Sun generates on a truly powerfully sunny day.  The heat causes heat waves which can be heard as maybe a soft low frequency continuous thud or distortion that just resonates and permeates all over.  It triggers breezes to come in and if there are trees, birds they are prompted into motion.  If you’re by an ocean the rawnesss of that energy is enhanced with the transition of water waves rippling from a humungous ocean into the land of the shore.  But even if there was no breeze, no ocean, no trees, and nor birds, I swear I can still hear something that is the Sun.  Imagine a scene in your mind at night and now imagine it with a rip roaring Sun.  I don’t know about you but in that imagined scene don’t your hear something different?

And so today as I basked in the present I savored the sound of the Sun. I savored the sound of the Sun now and the Sun in the past in all of those places.  Like a huge symphony across time and space I touch every point of my trail of my spirit across time and space under the loving stare of that familiar Sun, that one thing that quite honestly seems to have stayed the same for as long as I can remember.

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